where nobody goes

2009-06-21T13:24:00.002+08:00

wanted to blog cause I found an internet cafe near my motel that cost about 25cents per hour! yet, my train of thoughts keep getting interrupted by the terrible traffic outside the shóp!

going to watch a live football match later - Danang vs Ho Chi Minh; how apt! hahaha can't wait! and then we'll be going clubbing tonight! my 2nd time clubbing in my entire life, and I honestly hope it will be better than my first time in Danang.

many things have happened in VN, fill u guys in when i return! tata now! good dáy (:

ps/ if u're wondering why i'm blogging in such a weird language style, that's because my english has became totally cui to the max. hahahah we just keep laughing over how distorted it has become. lol.

2009-06-09T21:29:00.003+08:00

why must life be full of choices?
if only we didn't have a choice to choose, to live, to regret or to hope.

rah rah rahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

i know i know, i gottah stop this depression thingy. i don't even know what's causing it.. but all i wanna do lately ever since i came back is to hide in my room and just look at the airplanes fly past, and listen to the ships honk at night - a true cure for loneliness; you know they are there, always, somewhere looking beyond their view, looking perhaps at you.

2009-06-08T03:00:00.000+08:00

emo buff;

happiness' just an eye shut away.

2009-06-05T16:09:00.002+08:00

Day 4 back here in SG and i'm slowly adjusting back to the life I once had here.

2 weeks may seem like a pretty short span of time for anything to happen, but everything unimaginable did happen... and boy, was it great.

how unexpectedly life can catch you sometimes; yet it seems that the more unprepared your heart is, the more fulfilling the experience you gain, and the greater you are willing to open your heart to welcome things you once took for granted, or did not appreciate, or simply were not aware of.

2 weeks in VN probably taught me more than what 2 years in SG did; 2 weeks in VN probably gave me more enriching experiences than what 2 years in SG did; and 2 weeks in VN probably made me realised so much more about myself than I really did in my entire 20 years of life.

Words cannot simply do justice to how special those last 2 weeks were to me, nor even if pictures could speak a thousand words, will a million photos be able to express them.

Perhaps after awhile, we will all move on with our lives and like before, PUM III will only remain as a distant memory, only a dream that I woke up abruptly from, and it's reality only proven by the existence of hundreds of photos that no one will ever glance at again. Yet for now, before I start becoming a true blue Singaporean again who is only immersed in the business of life, let me escape into the little special place we built and soak up all the lovely memories I had for one last time(:

2009-06-03T02:10:00.002+08:00

so much memories, how do i just chuck them away?

it's my fault though.... i just have to take sole responsibility...............

never thought it'll be like this, who's to forgive me???

2009-05-11T10:54:00.002+08:00

looking through all the photos, i suddenly realized how much i miss 06s401(:

knowing that you can be yourself around them, knowing that they'll take good care of you when you lose your steps, knowing that they'll be there with fun, laughter and a listening ear whenever, wherever.

10:00am meeting on a summer's monday.. suckkks.

4 more days to go to vietnam.... arghh! pray for me guys(:

2009-05-01T22:49:00.002+08:00

i hate it when a B isn't considered good or average in SMU AT ALL.
it sucks. everyone around you is either getting a B+ or an A- that a B appears to be the most vulgar thing that you've ever laid eyes upon.

I thank God for blessing me with everything I have thus far, but recently things aren't going quite smoothly for me and I'm afraid that I may lose sight of everything...

I used to be a really stupid kid, doing so badly in school that even my tutor had to encourage me nearly every single lesson to not give up by telling me the Bird Story. I never knew the exact morale behind it, but it goes something like "the hard working bird will eventually get his worm" or something like that.

In primary school, my parents were just more than happy that I didn't get into EM3 or the normal academic stream.

And then secondary school came, and I suddenly felt my brain cells pumping hard and I became a little smarter.

And I started to experience the joy of doing well in school and of success in my different paths of life besides studies like job interviews, school interviews, driving tests and such.

I did pretty well in uni during my first sem and I started hoping for things I never thought I could achieve. And I did.
All that was required of me was to get a pretty decent grade for this sem and everything could be great.

Yet I screwed it up. I screwed it up by a mere 0.04.

Why, why Lord? Why take it away from me?
Worst still, why make it so close within my reach?

I don't know what to do anymore.
That was the only reason that kept me moving. The only thing that motivated me while I study so hard late through the night.

I feel like a blind man walking aimlessly.
like a homeless man roaming through the streets.

Please, take me home and lead the way. Please, I beg you.

2009-04-25T16:09:00.002+08:00

yay!!!(:

all the painstaking hours spent in front of my computer typing essays after essays are not in vain!!!(((:

i've got an A for Academic Writing!!! OMG!!!

(((((:

LOVE PROF, JACINDA AND BABY FOR HELPING ME VET MY ESSAYS TIME AND TIME AGAIN!!!(:

COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT YOU THREE! <3>

THANK YOU SOO SOOOO MUCH!!!

2009-04-24T20:21:00.002+08:00

it's summer! (haha yes i know, i'm one week late)

been pretty busy despite it being the hols, but at least it's the kinda busy-ness that i enjoy and can actually live with!

arghh, vietnam's so near ahead... i actually dread going there and am starting to have nightmares about it.. sigh.

anyway, jie's away at melbourne so i have the car for 9 days! whoopie!!!

drove to Sunset way yst with the lovelies(:

had freshly baked pizza, followed by gelato on a really yummy cone! for $2.50! that's really cheap!

oh yeah! i had a touristy fun-filled day last monday! eunice and i decided to bring our exchange friend around tourists hot spots like Sentosa and the flyer!

omg, songs of the sea is AMAZING!!! i'm so going back to catch it again. it's totally worth the $10!

and the flyer looks amazing at night!!! okay i know i said i wouldn't ride it till the IR is done but who can resist an offer of $10! anyway it's realllllly pretty from up there. Singapore looks great with it's beautiful night skyline!

and yes, i felt like a true tourist that day, i'm officially a Singapore fan convert!

pre-trip camp next fri to sun, class chalet next next thurs to sat and then it's time for my trip! GROANSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS))):

i'm feeling so upset about it and i don't know why... bad feeling. please pray?

oh and yes! i applied to be my prof's teaching assistant next sem for psych! met him today for an informal interview so wishy lucky!

bum ard now on a fri night cause baby's encik is a big old meano))):

ahhh, i have totally nothing to do now, nothing to watch on tv!!! stupid SCV!!! paid so much for it and yet it shows low quality programs half of the time!!! i should change my programs bundle soon!

2009-04-18T12:06:00.001+08:00

things will get better, they always do

2009-04-02T23:27:00.003+08:00

have you ever gotten that feeling - when u think back about the stuff u once did, and totally regretted doing them; wished they were fleeting memories, that could never come back and haunt you again?

and then you try to pinch yourself, to shock yourself out of it, hoping that all those were just ghost chapters of your life that never existed?

you saved me, more than you would ever know...

2009-04-02T14:01:00.000+08:00

The Lord also will be refuge for the oppressed, a refuge in times of trouble

Psalm 9:9

2009-03-28T11:22:00.000+08:00

i want an lg prada phoneeeeeeeee!!!!!

okay byebye!

2009-03-20T11:54:00.000+08:00

who's to say when and where the wind will blow

2009-03-10T13:08:00.002+08:00

life has degenerated into:

-counting down to week 15

-3 digits with a dot that will thereby proclaim your entire future

please please please...

help me find meaning again.

i've lost him and

he must be doing something very mean now):

2009-03-01T22:26:00.003+08:00

pearlene --

doesn't like this term.. anymore.

can't wait for 14th april to come.

needs to start studying hard-ER!

is feeling very very insecure about everything! boohoo! ))):

2009-02-19T23:09:00.002+08:00

screw it---

11:10.........................................

four hundred and sixty six words.. ONLY?!

2009-02-13T16:07:00.002+08:00

the lines have been blurred

who else defines;

the string's no longer taut---

Then I heard you say,

I promise you, I'm always there

When your heart is filled with sorrow and despair

I'll carry you

When you need a friend

you'll find my footprints in the sand

2009-02-10T00:11:00.000+08:00

and yes, we all learn how to cope

somehow or another, we do.

2009-02-05T21:21:00.002+08:00

as it hung from the half torn branch with all its might,

wishing and hoping that it wouldn't give way to its weight

the brown, wrinkled and half dried leaf glanced below -

thereby lies its fate

and all it could think of was how its life depended on something so insignificant -

so natural and belittled

and i never saw life the same way again.

2009-01-28T01:11:00.001+08:00

and just so you know,

i facebooked you to see how you have been

2009-01-28T01:00:00.003+08:00

sometimes i still think about you;

i'll never understand why you left,

never know if you think about me too

and a little part of me wonders if i could have done anything

to keep you here with me

and whether things will be anywhere better if you were here

or how they would have been

i don't think i really know the true you -

your thoughts, your feelings, your actions and your dreams

they all seemed like a mystery to me

even though we were once closed... supposedly.

lately, i've been imagining how it'll be like and how nice it'll be if you were around

just by the corner, eating, sleeping, watching tv.

telling me this and that, and telling me off (even if you did it out of namesake's)

and i felt a little surge of warmth inside,

knowing that you're there....

and then it disappeared.

just like how everything did, in an instant.

2009-01-23T09:50:00.004+08:00

hmmmmmmmmmmm, my subway cookies taste funny. i think the uncle downstairs don't quite know how to bake! i bought 2 cookies and one's really hard, and the other's realllly soft. boo, i prefer hard cookies to soft ones!

woohoo! can't wait for today to end!

cny cny cny, loveee!

edited; 1230pm

WOOOHOOOO, I JUST FINISHED MY FREAKING ACADEMIC WRITING ESSAY!!!

omg, 1192 words. i'm so freaking proud of myself and damn bloody elated!

i was stuck at 844 words and i managed to crap our 3oo odd words (2 arguments and a conclusion) to make it sound academically intelligent!

and it's by far the longest piece i've ever written in almost twenty years of my life!

and i'm still one day ahead of the deadline!!!

now i'm just really exhausted from the past 1 week of thinking and writing and typing away on my mac everywhere which includes waiting for the mrt, waiting in the driver's seat etccccc.

writing needs stamina and inspiration ok!

hahahah cny came early for me! (((:

2009-01-20T11:16:00.002+08:00

i'm really getting quite sick of the mess sprawled across my table!

what did i even do for it to be in this state? honestly, when i came back from school it was perfectly tidied up. arghhhhh. can't do any work, too much distractions! too messy and disorganized!!!

you know, i'm starting to realize that i get quite easily annoyed at things when they aren't in an orderly fashion, yes, despite my room being so messy. arghhh!!!

oh yes, and to all of you! my place's open on 1st & 3rd day of cny k! tell me when u're coming down, and when i can go down! heh(:

yes yes, happy holidays!

2009-01-18T22:34:00.002+08:00

It's amazing how nearly 2 years have gone by and yet it feels like we've only been together for 2 months(:

cny's coming and i can't wait for those visitations! sigh, only bec's not around this new year and it simply won't be the same. i miss walking down the long stretch of road towards 40c!

hmmm, and i should seriously stop procrastinating.

sigh, let me let u in to a big fat secret ok?

I HATE SCHOOL!!!

and it suddenly hit me in the face that life goes by real quickly and if i don't do something about it, i fear i might look back 80 years later and regret not going what i want to do.

but then again, what do i really want to do?

2009-01-13T09:17:00.002+08:00

the willow trees a distance away

they stand so tall yet silently frail

alas, the summer breeze comes

and it's breath giving it strength while it stays

but who knows for how long it remains

the lonely willow trees, a lonesome song they pray

9:21am. The rhythmic ticks of the clock somehow sends a chill down my spine. Time's running out - every single second it does. But to what? What surprising turn of event will Time bring when the hand strikes a minute of an hour of today?

Time, have mercy.

2009-01-10T14:07:00.003+08:00

You know, it suddenly occurred to me that I'm actually working & studying at the same time! Woohoo! I'm an adult (or pretty much grown up)!

and.....shit. i'm turning twenty.

2009-01-08T10:02:00.002+08:00

This 1st week of school has been filled with such blessings and I got to witness the hilarious side of God's plans. okay hilarious to a certain extent and later overpowered by true amazement.

I kinda like the feeling of stepping into class not knowing who to expect or what to anticipate and then get fully blown away by how God had planned everything well in advance for me! Somehow, in every class so far, I've unwrapped a little surprise each day(:

Anywayyyyyyy, it's only the FIRST week and i'm feeling the burn already. sucks, i always knew this term would be so much worse, but i didn't know it'll be THIS bad.

anyhoooo, thanks weizhen for the lovely dinner and such an empowering talk(: i guess it's pretty cool how we didn't really hang out much at all in smu but am still able to understand how each other really truly feel(: somehow, talking to you makes me feel like i've known you for years!

and thank You for never failing to provide me(:

2009-01-06T23:25:00.002+08:00

the 100th post.

sometimes i wonder when will i ever get to see my silver lining. i know everything will eventually turn out just fine, but as the big 2 slowly comes around the corner, you start to realize that there are simply so many other stuff to consider and things sometimes, just don't end well. the lingering presence makes it so much more daunting.

i guess the scariest part is not the fact that you have to take somethings at face value, but that the words that you vow by no longer seem to work - what you once believed in suddenly evaporates and no longer holds the same meaning.

as 09 comes and go, i'm quite sure that i'll start to doubt more things that my innocence once used to take for granted and i'm afraid by doing so, i'll lose a little more of me that i'm familiar with.

i guess that's why they say people change. i used to think that people don't change - we just don't know them well before. but now i truly vouch change is the only constant. that's because every single day, every occurrence and thought somehow just grips you consciously, or subconsciously, and challenge your beliefs and inner self. Hence through all these daily churning, a part of us slowly gets chipped away and gets replaced by something new and unfamiliar.

and do you want to know what i'm most afraid of?

that ten years down the road, i've changed so much that i won't even recognize myself any longer, and that the part of myself that i was once so proud of, no longer exist.

2009-01-04T23:24:00.003+08:00

PEARLENE IS

SO NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO SCHOOL

DOES NOT HAVE ANYTHING TO WEAR TMR

(HAS BEEN )WATCHING AMERICAN IDOL MARATHON FOR THE PAST 6 HOURS

KINDA THANKFUL THAT SCHOOL STARTS AT TWELVE EVERDAY 'CEPT FRIDAYS(CAUSE IVE NO SCH BABY!!)

FEELING APPREHENSIVE

PRAYING THAT SHE'LL MEET SOMEONE SHE KNOWS IN CLASS TMR

FEELING SO MANY OTHER DAMN EMOTIONS THAT SHE JUST WANTS THE 7 TERMS TO PASS BY QUICKLYYYYYYYYYY!!!

2009-01-03T23:02:00.003+08:00

yay! i successfully cooked baked pasta for dinner today! (:

baby & yati said it was super yummyyyy!

so all of you are invited to try it out, just tell me when & i'll cook it for u! hahaha

dearest minhui has top priority ok! (:

shok! and come over so i can cook my maid's kind of pasta for u! haha, she taught me how to before she left!(: remember how we used to go back to my place after school & i'll ask her to cook it!

shucks, school's starting in 2 days....... RAH!

yesterday was fun! (despite the 4 hours early morn meeting in sch....)

a trip down to lil' india got me:

-a pretty $5 eyebrow

-$1.50 coconut drink!

-$1.90 super cool retro shades!

-$8 Kills Slowly Ed Hardy (*cough* INSPIRED *cough*) tank

-$6.80 mutton briyani

-plenty of sunshine, love, joy & laughter with shok

-hilarious photo shots that only shok will shoot with me!

and baby, i just love lying on ur lap beneath the moon&stars away from the rest of the world and not talking but knowing exactly what we each feel(:

2008-12-31T14:49:00.002+08:00

PEARL'S NEW YEAR RESOULTION

1. LOSE 5 KG! really, it isn't about vanity, i just wanna be healthier. Trust me.

2. Therefore, steer off fastfood & late night suppers!

3. Grow closer to God, and the church which includes my cell!

4. Hence, have QT frequently consistently.

5. Be less impulsive!!! Also along with it, a less impulsive spender which brings me to point no. 6

6. SAVE MONEYYYYYYY! I badly need to do this in 2009 after blowing off $1000 just this month. Yes, I"m still not over ittttt!!!

7. Pull up my GPA next sem! Which I feel might be harder cause I'm doing 5 mods now instead of 4.... tskkkkkk.

Okay I shall not be too ambitious so I'm just gonna focus on these seven resolutions!

I've listed mine, so what are yours? (:

ps/ this reminds me of how shok, bec & i would conference call each other at the stroke of twelve years ago just to list down our resolutions(:

2008-12-28T17:16:00.003+08:00

i'm in a blogging (aka boring) mood right now so i'll update on my lovely Christmas '08!(:

Christmas started out early with our class gathering at Jo's and it was great meeting up with everyone after awhile, and really quite endearing to know that despite each of us are taking different paths in our lives right now, things still feel pretty much the same as they did a year ago. That's 06S401 for you, always and forever!(:

Then I finally got to meet mh & shok after a really long time! what happened to our 1st tues of the month thingy!! and Dian Xiao Er tasted as good as everrr! (:

Went home for my family christmas dinner which was really delicious and yummmyyy(:

Christmas day was spent having lunch with my family and dinner with baby! We had indian cuisine after much contemplating on deciding to try something different this year and I didnt regret our decision at all! It was really good! Can't wait to go back there again and sink my teeth into that piping hot bowl of curry prawns!

And yesterday was Uom Mam fund raising at Malay Village! I totally have no idea what we were gonna sell until I went there with Michelle and realized we were selling bubble tea! Now I feel so cheated paying $1.50 for my bubble tea which really is quite unhealthy. But we did quite well! We sold 50+ cups I think, according to Samantha!

So now I can't wait to meet my angels & mh tomorrow and I miss my animals very very much already):

School's starting soon, blahhhhhhhhhhh ):

and then i felt loved(:

with love(:

2008-11-30T12:11:00.004+08:00

helllooo everybody!!! (:

my post-exam weekend have been greatttt!

went out with the Soci (social science) peeps after pol sci exams and it was such great fun! hahahaha ate & shopped & went to the arcade (omg)! ended up racing on the daytona with all the girls and.... having a para para meltdown! i can't believe everybody was sporting enough to get on the machine and do their thing! everyone were dancing kings&queens! hahaha it was funny, but inspiring at the same time to witness them (girls & guys)having the bravery to go out there trying to do it in front of everyone for their first time!

met baby after that and we drove down to Sitex to get my new camera! yippie! it was orginially $450 but was slashed to $199 and i've got 3 free gifts along with it!!! hahaha we're now ardent convertors of IT fairs and vow to get whatever electronic appliances from there!

and then we went to watch Madagascar at night! it rocks! go catch it! hehe

oh btw, we went to try out the walking-around-fountain-3-times-while-making-a-wish thingy!

really quite fun, but lame! haha i thought the effect of my cam was really nice, set it to low ISO!

ahaha that's baby's hands, looks like a girl's right! unfair! hahahah and shok! don't u think the boy in red looks like Fei Zai(aka Jia liang!!!)?

me on a small bike at Toys'R'Us!

ohh and then at night we went down to the Flyer with my family to have dinner at O'Leannes Sports Bar&Grill! the food was not bad although portion was a little bit small... which means that it's reallly suppperrr small by normal people's standard! chatted awhile over a bottle of red wine and then drove homeeeeee to watch A Walk to Remember on the DVD!

haha overall i had a wonnndeeerful weekend thanks to all my lovelies! (:

now, i can't wait to have a better time with my animals & angels & baby when he has his loonnngggg block leave! (: MEET ME SOONNNNNNNNNN!!!

2008-11-19T11:08:00.002+08:00

yay yay yay!!! (((:

dropped another kg! hehehe

all of u pls tell me that i lost weight the next time u see me k!!! hahaha

okay and yes, i came in here just to blog about that! haha

ahem, back to being my intellectual self and start studying!

miss u all lovelies so much!

9more days till freedom and then pls meet up with me!!! (((:

can't wait!! love u! bye!! (:

2008-11-18T16:55:00.002+08:00

YIPPIE DOODLES!!!!! ((((:

I'VE GOT AN A FOR MY POL SCI ESSAY!!! (((:

okay! back to studying pol sci! hahaha bye everyone! love u! (:

2008-11-16T16:41:00.002+08:00

no life, no life, and missing everybody sooo muchhhhh!!!

friday was a really gooddd day for me! (:

well just a thought - there are some groups in SMU that make u just wanna get the bloody project over and done with so that u dont have to meet those ppl ever again, while some groups that slowly become an integral part of ur sch life, that made SMU seem like such a lovely,humanized place after all and that makes ur heart aches when the project's over cause u wont be working with such fantastic ppl anymore.

i love my econs project mates! they made all the terrible shittyness of sch life so bearable!(:

heh, so we're done with our project and all our hard work paid off really well!

met CXQ at cityhall so that we cld go home tgth!! miss u so much la, stop sleeping ur ass off!!! hahaha

ok back to wasting my time, studying a totally useless subject... bye!

2008-11-12T16:22:00.002+08:00

omggggg. 4:22pm and i've been in the library for nearly 4 and a half hours.

studying alone while waiting for project meeting to start at 7pm till 11pm cause we have to rush out our report that has to be submitted tmr at 12pm!

btw, the library is kindly opened for 24hours these 2 weeks and i have a very good mind to just sleep over here!

sighhhh, kill me, just kill me please!

2008-11-07T02:22:00.003+08:00

OH. MY. GOD.

IT'S 2:22 AM AND I'M STILL STUCK WITH TONNSSSS TO DOOOOOO.

FREAKING ECONS PROJECT, STUPID FINANCE BUDGET, DANG BGS REPORT.... ARGH, IM JUST SO-DAMN-PISSEDDD OFFFFF.

SIGH, PEACE THE SPORK OUT, TATAS.

2008-11-03T00:33:00.001+08:00

12:33AM and i'm hungryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ):

2008-11-02T18:25:00.002+08:00

blahhh... term2's timetable's out and IT SUCKSSSSSSS.

no more morning classes but i end school at 645pm nearly everyday! (besides friday, cause i've got a 4-day week again! yippie! long weekend!:D)

anyway i don't have any same classes with vitya.. which is kinda sad, because this term we have been in the same classes for like 3 out of 4 classes?! and it's depressing too because i don't share any classes with most of the people that i grew close to this term.. it's stupid and annoying making friends allll over again and i foresee myself doing so for the rest of the terms in SMU, one thing which I REALLY HATE!!!

so anyway, shiping, carissa & i are gonna bid for the same course! so yippie! at least we get to be in one same class!

rahh, these few days have been reallly busy for me. friday night was orchard & clark quay with the econs project group mates! i've never seen THAT side of Singapore before so it was quite interesting! and i must say, Singaporeans really DO dress up during Halloween, and it's quite extreme too! Just that I saw toooo many Jokers imposter, easily ten? And baby tagged along too! haha with much love, thanks and appreciation. I don't know how I'm gonna stay there till 3am if it weren't for you(:

and shok! I saw the pub at clark quay with the hospital theme! hahaha it looks quite cool! let's go down there sometime after finals! hahaha

hmm, 635pm now which means i've been ploughing through my globalization essay for five hours and i've written......... 2 paragraphs, 313 words. Well done!

btw, AJISEN BEEF NOODEL SUCKSSSSSSS TO THE M, M-A-X!

ps/ SHOK & MINHUI!!! THIS COMING TUES IS THE FIRST TUES OF THE MONTHHH! HAHAHA :D

PPS (PSS?)/ I MISS MY ANIMALS VERY MUCH!!! SAT BREAKY?

2008-10-29T23:33:00.002+08:00

i must be really tired. i actually typed blogger as GLOBBER... hmmm, i think that must be my sub-conscious mind telling me what SMU is. it globs your life, time and brain away....!!!

just finished typing out two chapters of psych (haha okay, not the whole 2 chapters la) for my open-book test tmr! i know it's kinda cheating... BUTTTT, what's a girl to do when it's impossible to remember all the different kinds of disorders & therapies!!?

OMG, psych presentation tmr... at least it'll be 3 down, 1 to go after tmr!

i must say, it really isn't THAT frightening to be speaking in front of 40 ppl now, i bet if i'm my current self in Mr Lin's class, he'll just looooveeeee me (well, i know he already does)! hahaha

and as another wed goes past, it just proves further that pol sci sucks. sorry john donaldson, as much as a great prof u are, i really really hate your course!!!

yawnnn, tmr's gonna be a loooonnngg day with UN3 meeting at 7pm (omg, i'm so gonna reach home at 10PM!!) okay i hope everything goes wellll! shok meet me tmr! :D

hohoho, bangkok baby soon! (:

miss u alll lovelies! MEET UP, MEET UP!!!

and happy 22nd birthday jie! (: hope u enjoyed the cakeey!!

2008-10-23T20:43:00.002+08:00

woohoo! i got back my Psych grades today!!!

i've got 79.33%! but then.. can I just be a b**** and say that I'm not really happy with my grades?

I know I should be happy with it already.. but I was really hoping to use it to pull up my GPA, and I just missed by 0.67% to an A! SIGH.

Now to work hard for presentations and finals! Wish me luck!

ps/ somehow, i've got a feeling i'll do badly for Econs, cause something good just happened... but whatever it is, i'm just gonna place all my trust in You.(:

2008-10-21T13:23:00.003+08:00

sometimes indeed i wish i could be a simpleton; i always thought the phrase "Ignorance Is Bliss" truly does have a whole lot of meaning to it.

I'm not a huge fan of changes, and neither am I a pro at adaptation... but I came to realize that only through stepping out of ur comfort zone, and facing the many obstacles laid it front of you, then can u truly reach a whole new level of profound happiness and comfort.

but then again... it's like a cycle - one that never ends. upon reaching a new level of satisfaction, life will throw a whole mountain of hurdles at u once again and then u strive to overcome then, reach another level and so on and so forth.....

which makes me go back to my point - sometimes, i just wish i could be a simpleton.

i spent my tues morn snoozing, going to the market with my mama and then having a rather simple meal at the hawker centre. all of which i am very thankful for, despite having to return home to hit the course packet of the cumbersome pol sci, which over the last ten weeks i've grown to hate so fondly. now, memories of TK days when we sat in Mr. Yusof's history class came to remind me why I've never decided to touch another history book after Sec2.

hmmmm.... seriously, i've no idea why i'm writing this entry actually.

maybe i should bring my baby for a walk! hahaha

thanks shok for yesterday studying-cum-catching up date! i wanna see u in that F21 dress! hahaha

and thanks baby for just about everything(:

2008-10-18T20:58:00.002+08:00

i took a long hot bath when i reached home after a terribly long, disappointing day...

had psych and econs mid terms today which really left me in the pits, need i say more?

i'll be happy if i could get a hundred marks for my econs mid terms!.... well, it's upon 700.

ivy was sooo funny! when the prof handed out the question sheet, there was this huge sentence that read "THIS PAPER IS UPON 700." (and excuse me! the last 0 was clearly hand written!!!) and she immediately turned to me and went, "wah! the prof is a big joker man!"

so we flipped through the paper and... the questions were worth like 20, 50, 100, 150 marks?!!

well, just one question prof! .....have u ever heard of simplest form?!?!?!?!

so psych was fine... but it was disappointing to me, because i was counting on it to pull up my grades, and because i plan to major in it, i wanted to do well for it... oh well, it's over like what they say. back to endless SMUgging!

yippie though! karen tze's treating me to dim sum!! hahahaha(((:

and i can't wait to meet shok for botak jones!!!

2008-10-14T13:42:00.003+08:00

hello everybody! i hope that you've been having a fantastic start of the week!

i must admit, this week despite being my mid-terms week has been going quite smoothly for me! i'm sucha happy girl after being under Daddy's wings all week!

Firstly, after coming back from church and prayinggg reall hard, I miraculously received a long overdue email from Project Uom Nam III(Vietnam OCIP!) on Sunday telling me that I've been accepted and even better, given the post of Financial Director!!((: I nearly dropped down to my knees and gave praise!

Then on Monday i had my Business and Society (BGS) mids and..... I scored 78%!!! Yippie dooo doo!!!

And and, the best thing yet! MAMA AGREED TO GO TO BANGKOK ON DECEMBER FOR 1 WEEK AND SHE ASKED MCKEN TO COME ALONG TOO!!! HEHEHE!!!

YAY YAY YAY! (((:

and yummy, at this point I'm reminded of how you always used to tell me, "you have to wait for good things to come, and that they always come in a pair!" (:

heh, now all I have to do is cross my fingers for tomorrow's Pol Sci essay. after getting a C for the previous one, it's really putting so much pressure on me to produce a better essay since each constitutes to about 8.25% of my final grade.

okay, back to studying! ((: miss all of u very very much and I pray that God will bless everyone of you too(and I know for sure He will!)

2008-10-08T10:51:00.002+08:00

dear Mexicans out there,

I know you like your women big, and place your food on a pedestal.. but just a comment here! could u please possibly come up with more ingredients for your food and use less starch?

SO, I finally met Shok & MH for lunch at Holland V! (: haha becky, you're missed as well! we ate at this Mexican restaurant called Cha Cha Cha! The only reason why we decided to eat there was because of its name seriously. The food didn't turn out too bad.. but I grew sick of it after the meal. So, no more Mexican food for me!

Haha, we're gonna conquer all the restaurants there! Next up, the Italian restaurant with the pretty rooftop! And it's a shame we didn't bring our cams ):

Okay and damn it! I just realised I have eightttt freaking chapters to study for psych.. and it isn't open-book!

2008-09-30T15:54:00.002+08:00

oh mannn.....

after 1238731349 hours infront of my mac, 125326 visited websites and blogs, 1337642 steps walked around the house...i've only written 3 paragraphs and 570 words for my essay!!!

zzz!!! im starting to get realllly zonked out!

tweet tweet! im missing everybody with much LOOvvEEEe!

hee hee, writer's block got the better of me!

can't wait for that little boy to rescue me!!! hoho, movie date tonight! yippie!!!

ps/ mh! hahaha not that i dont wanna pay attention.. but it just kills to sit in a super boring seminar, listening to a lecture that doesn't make sense rambling on and on about irrelevant stuff for 3 hours!!!

2008-09-29T11:12:00.001+08:00

OH MANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

I'M SUPER BORED IN CLASSSSSSS

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

2008-09-28T17:59:00.000+08:00

OH MY GOSH!!! THIS IS SUPER SICK!!! TOOK IT OFF AN EMAIL THAT JIE SENT ME!!! BEWARE, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!! SKIP THIS ENTRY IF YOU CAN'T STAND GRUESOME PICTURES... OTHERWISE, SCROLL DOWN, YOU BRAVE HEARTED ONE!

Terrible accident... most unfortunate for the F1 community....

Warning: Please do not open if you have a weak stomach... shocking image.

Please always observe safety... this is a shocking image of excess speed where it actually flipped over.. not for the faint hearted...

2008-09-23T13:58:00.001+08:00

Today i learnt a huge lesson in life(:

I realized that though sometimes we make mistakes, we do so for a reason. For if such wrongs were not committed, we would not have been able to learn the truths about it, and through this learning process, might not have encountered things and people that will otherwise fade into the background in our daily lives.

5 more hours till the trip to the airport...... ):

rebecca lee mei chen, i'll miss u aplenty!!!

2008-09-16T13:01:00.000+08:00

oh my god, J. Donaldson is trying to kill us with an overload of readings!!!

guess what! it took me only 3 songs to drive home from school! which is abt... 9 mins? hahaha coool! love the highway!

hmmm, and it surprises me to know that i'm meeting new people everyday who actually knew my name wayyy before i even meet them. sigh, i must be really living in my own world whenever i'm in school or i think i might just be suffering from a serious case of faces-overload!

yupp, current favourite word of the term - "overload", simply because i'm wayyyy OVERLOADED with everything!!!

i miss everyone so much, and everything about them! meet up, meet up!!!

okay back to political culture! tatas!!!

happy, happy birthday little bro! haha it's funny that you've the same birthdate as SM Lee Kuan Yew! Much expectations for you to perform like him ok!!! hahaha! can't wait for your celebration tonight! i'm cramming all my work just to have dinner with u!!!

2008-09-12T22:07:00.000+08:00

If I could, I'd want somebody to make all the decisions for me in my life.

I really don't like making decisions, especially those that truly have serious impacts in my life.. but then again, I realised that it's only through the process of decision making that taught me how to keep faith, and put Him beyond everything else. And it's only through the outcome of such decisions that enables me to fully internalize the extent of His power and promises.

I had a wonderful friday!

Classes ended abruptly early today with the sudden announcement by Prof having to attend a LTA conference regarding the change in transportation fare at 915 (and classes started at 830!) so i had like a 45 mins class?

Anyway, my group decided to check into a GSR for our group meeting and.. we ended up playing 02 Jam! hahaha it SOOOOOOO reminded me of PW meetings la! Oh gosh, suddenly miss JC so much! Yum, remember our 2 player game? hahah i tried it today but I think we make a better team together!!

Met Eunice for lunch and we decided to go down to Central! Alighted and we saw this Bak Kut Teh stall with lots of ppl, so we tried it! I thought it wasn't as nice as the one I used to have back at my old place.. the pig's trotter was JUST FATS!!! but anyhow, the soup was realllly yummy! Walked around Central a bit and thanks babe for the company and everything! I'm really glad we make it a point to try and have lunch every fri amidst our very busy smu life! I'm really thankful to have you as a friend in school, knowing that we can just talk about stuff despite not being in the same school and all! (:

Went back to school and decided to crash at the library! haha Karen came along as well! So after that Karen and I just waited for the Social Science Research Workshop to start.. it was kinda useful, but I was falling asleep half way through.. haha after that I decided to borrow my BGS text from the Course Reference area and studied okay!!! hahahah okay la, half of the time we were just laughing away but I managed to read through a few pages!

Hahaha we bought dim sum to the OCIP talk we went to! the dim sum had really funny names - Super Fish Ball! It was really bigg, it took me more than 10 bites to finish it!

rah rah, i took a cab home cause I was very tired and I think that this post is very shallow and there's no meat in it and no proper sentence structure. haha im too tired. and CXQ please tell Chen mama HELLO! HAPPY MOONCAKE FESTIVAL! I called just now and she asked me how i was but i only managed to say AUNTIE before she passed the phone to u! hahaha

woww, this is a really long entry. wth, bus fares are increased for those who take direct buses. i think i should take a bus to tanah merah, train to city hall, bus to school. haha can save me 15 cents! Shok! auntie right! hahaha no la just kidding!

okay im gonna take a nap now at 1023. byebye!

2008-09-10T16:30:00.000+08:00

now i'm venturing into my fourth week of school here in smu! just 7 terms, 11 more weeks to go! hahaha okay, i'm starting to become less cynical (which i guess is a good thing), starting to become more integrated into the smu life. today, i finally realized how the double major thing works!

but i'll really like to thank Daddy for walking this journey with me, although His doings are revealed daily in a minimal amount, i'm certainly sure that He has been guiding me, and planning every single detail that had happened.

today was a pretty good day in school, despite failing my pol sci quiz again! i'm seriously turning my back on thoughts of majoring in it... >=(

hoo boy! it's thurs tmr! time realllly flies!!! more essays and projects to work on... BLAH!

ps/ this weekend from fri night allll the way to tues night was indeed, magical (:

2008-09-05T16:05:00.000+08:00

HAHAHA!!! I JUST READ SOMETHING REALLY FUNNY ON YAHOO ANSWERS!!!

"The next world war will be between China and the United States, with a great possibility of a combat theater in outerspace."

2008-09-02T20:36:00.001+08:00

i just read some blogs and i realized i've been really, really, really stupidly selfish in neglecting the people who means so dearly to me in one way or another....

i'm sorry becky, min hui and shok.. i know it's tough as each day passes now and there isn't much time left.. but.... i hope we can really make good use of our sleep over this time.

becky, you'll always be in my heart and prayers whenever, wherever. what you said really tugged my heartstrings... our friendship goes a looonng way back and it's funny how two totally different people, physically and mentally, can actually find so much similarities in thoughts and mindsets. you were the first true friend i ever poured my heart out to and one particular sleepover still finds its way back into my mind sometimes. remember that once when we just sat on your bed with the lights off crying over every little single detail in our lives? that was probably when i realized that friends aren't just for times of merry-making; realized that i've been so superficial before; realized that our friendship means the world to me and it'll always be.

i know it's easy for me to bury the fact that you'll be leaving really soon.. i guess it didn't hit me hard when u first told me ur plans for going overseas have materialised, or when the countdown started happening... but it really came as a slap across my face when u blogged about it and poured out ur fears and sadness about leaving. and i realized that i've totally neglected you during this course of time that meant the most.. please forgive me for my oversight):

i really do hope though, and i really mean it, that i'll be able to visit u all the way in UK sometime and honestly, when i think of that day coming, i just see the two of us going crazy at the airport, travelling downtown shopping like mad, and just laughing and chatting allll the way as though nothing ever happened even though u're miles away. and i know for sure that nothing will ever change for the bond between us has been long inbuilt ever since the first time feelings of hatred struck our hearts.. haha until now, it still tickles me thinking about our childish ways in TK. but you know, i'm really glad that everything happened.

so darling, no matter who u meet at UK, or how they treat you, just remember that everything happens for a reason which will unfold to bring many wonderful surprises! (:

i love you rebecca lee mei chen (remember mei zhen xiang ba kwua?! hahahah) you'll always be the admired in my heart, from being a passive, timid girl who blossomed into someone who found her strength and bravery(: please take gooooodd care and know that i'm always only a call away, an email away or a skype away when you're feeling lonely over there(:

2008-09-02T20:12:00.000+08:00

i'd really love updating my blog but somehow everything's so monotonous, there isn't anything much to blog about! and i really believe that everyone one out there in uni who owns a blog feels the same way too.. hahaha

house moving's more or less done! i met some of my neighbors and i'm getting well accustomed to living here albeit it's very much smaller than my previous place. or so it seems, i'm getting de-attached from my homes after moving a few times. somehow, i didn't even feel a tinge of sadness the last day when i was at my previous home.

i'm currently being buried by mounting readings, re-writing proposals over and over again, driving down to school for projects.... oh mann. i wonder how i'm gonna survive the next 4 hours of my uni life.

good thing the hills are back, and gossip girls soon!

haha i realize my writing's getting so incoherent.. smu makes you think about random stuff. oh yes, it teaches you how to bull on your toes too(like during class participation, hahaha)!

okay presentation tmr!!! just cant wait to get it over and done with! (:

love and miss alllll of you very very! can't wait for friday's sleepover!!! (((:

and maybe dinner with the animals soon once cxq's done with her halll games!!!

yawn, i'm getting tired... ahaha bye!!!

2008-08-26T01:05:00.001+08:00

sigh.... it's really only the 5th day of school and i'm burnt.

been mugging since this afternoon, it's 105am and i'm still not done studying):

i really hope everything will go along real fine, that everything will become better eventually.

i'm leaving everything in Your hands(:

2008-08-15T14:55:00.000+08:00

Today, while playing Marriage D' Amour on my piano, images of various people just flashed through my mind.

I saw Shok and I sitting by her piano trying to play that particular song together - me playing the LH while her playing the RH.

I saw Becky and I walking home after school, and I never realized how precious those ten to fifteen mins walk were where we'd just talk about everything under the big blue sky - from lim ah ber! to drama club, to how we used to hate each other, to my first breakup, to family matters.... just basically everything.

and then I saw the four of us having recess together, sometimes just sitting outside the D&T room chatting away the little 35mins break we have.

and then these images somehow disappeared and like a picture book in chronological order, images of my jc life started to flash by.

cxq and i meeting in the evening to share mudpie at siglap's coffee club... the phone calls that yum and i would occasionally have which was so precious in content, and the times when cxq, jo and i would mugggg like mad just before A's.

and then I suddenly saw the first few dates that baby and I had. Sitting by the river, watching fireworks, playing the guitar...

Moving on to uni, I know some stuff have inevitably changed for life and we can never repeat those stuff again but I'm blessed to know that at least I have such wonderful memories to keep dear to my heart.

so darlings, the next time when I play that piece on the piano again, be sure to know that all of you will appear in my mind again!

ps/ i really hope that i wldn't be thatttt sentimental.. it makes me sad sometimes):

2008-08-13T01:11:00.000+08:00

this is crazy. school hasn't started and i received an email from my prof regarding my homework for my first class next wed!!! oh mann, now i have to go down to smu to buy my textbook and course materials... sighh. i think i'll just buy them on monday and muggg on tuesday!

weird. uni life really isn't the same as jc's. somehow, you are actually compiled to study really hard for some unknown reason. i guess it's because it's really about practical learning, and the fact that this time it's for real. whatever you do here, however hard you study, whichever course you take WILL play a prominent decision factor on your career and your future.

and the changes are evident.

i just took this personality test, the exact one which i took when i was in jc, and i got a totally different set of personality type! and on both accounts, i felt that they were both quite accurate. i guess this really shows that people do change. (btw, for those who're interested my personality type's ESTJ. you can find out what's your's on http://mypersonality.info )

school's starting soon and this week has been pretty slow-moving besides the dinner date with my angels! oh darlings, i wish we could have spent a longer time together! time really flew by and it was really just such an enjoyable dinner together! can't wait for our sleepover!!! six years of friendships and still counting! i feel really blessed with friends like you 3! (((:

and i miss my animals too): CXQ didnt make it for breaky on sat so it didn't count!!! please meet this sat ok!!!

heh, and as always, baby and i went to catch the fireworks with the other thousands of singaporeans on national day. yes yes, you all know me! i'm really patriotic!

okay i'm always bad at ending blog posts cause it gets a little awkward towards the end so i'm just gonna end here abruptly!

ps/ GO TEAM CHINA!!! (:

pps/ the only reason why i'm cheering for Team China's cause Team Singapore really isn't in a lot of events and.. i'm a Chinese! (:

2008-08-06T23:46:00.000+08:00

hmmmm.... now i'm wondering whether i should bid for one more module? i have 4 this term and i can take up to 5!

rahhh.. i heard we can't use our GC in statistic classes! ):

i miss animals, angels and baby very very much!!!

i'm soooo bored at home... maybe i shld start packing!

2008-08-05T11:28:00.000+08:00

I JUST GOT MY TIMETABLE!!!!!!!

HEH, FOUR DAYS WEEK, 830AM TO 12NOON, TUES OFF!!!

YAY YAY YAY!!! SO I'M PRACTICALLY STUDYING HALF DAY FOR THIS WHOLE TERM!!!!

WHOOPIEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

I ♥ SMU!!! (((((:

p/s now i just have to worry about making friends in class):

2008-08-04T17:36:00.000+08:00

busy busy busy! this might be a looonggg entry but i'm just gonna be blogging them down cause i don't wanna lose those memories!!!

well, honestly.... I LOVE FTB CAMP!!!!!!!!!! can you imagine? i guess my group really made the camp experience a huge difference. everyone was just so encouraging, nice and sweet. and my faci was... MARIE LUO PEIYI!!! hahaha tk senior!

i guess i learnt quite a bit about SMU life through these people, and i've taken with me many teachings too.

and for the first time, i actually cried because i felt like i let my group down. we could have came in first, but because of my limitations, we missed the finishing line by a few meters. and i just couldn't help the tears from falling because i see how much my group wanted to win the race, how much they encouraged me to keep going, keep running the race.

i guess i was really attached to the people around me then. they moved me and motivated me so so much. yuppp, and it's true. your group mates really make a difference in whether you enjoy the camp or not!

after those 3days, i came home with a realllly husky voice and super tanned skin! (:

and then i rushed down with beh to queue up for FOP! haha it's our second year together there now! (((:

and i soooo love our picnic moments by the fountain at suntec city! haha i guess we were the only couple there buying soooo much food, plopping ourselves by the roadside while listening to the booming music, singing loudly along with those familiar tunes, looking at stars and occasionally turning our heads and go "WAHHHH!!!! LAMBO!!!!" heh, beh only you would do that with me! remember when we watched Dark Knight and Batman crashed his car?? everyone in the cinema was like "oh no!" but we were like "omg!!!! THE LAMBO!!!!!!!" hahahaha damn classic!

oh yeah and today i did the stupidest thing ever!!! i didn't check my smu email and thought academic briefing was at 9 so i cabbed down alll the way to school and was stuck in a bloody long jam and in the end spent $19 on the damn cab fare!!! hahaha Vitya cabbed down from Jurong and spent $20! so you see how bad the jam was! and anyway, the stupidest thing was, i reached school at 930am, went into the audi and there was no one! and so i realised Vitya was right.... the briefing only started at 10am! arghhh. $19 down the drain!!!

anyway, some girls and i went for lunch after that at The Cathay and then... we went to the national museum cause... SMU STUDENTS GET FREE ADMISSION! hahaha just one out of the many privileges! ((:

anyway, the museum was really great! we spent like 4 hours there!

okay i'm gonna end off in a really anti-climax manner! bye!

ps/ timetable's still not out! arghhhh, OASIS and BOSS's too much for me to handle! and i have ZERO E$!!! how to bidddd!

and i really miss roxie, the angels and my beh of course! pls meet me soooon!!! ):

2008-07-30T19:40:00.001+08:00

On a totally random note, I thought that Dark Knight doesn't really deserve to breakthrough the US Box Office grossing in more than $3million in ten days (and still counting... making it one of the biggest block busters in the world ever!) but..... I really wish I could see more screen shots of Joker!

I find myself anticipating the Joker scenes and falling asleep during Batman's!

I miss the Joker really very much! I thought he played his role farrrr better than anyone so much so that he even out shone Batman! And I didn't even manage to catch Edison's face!! Call that his big moment in Hollywood?!! What! That was like a 1.5 seconds screen appearance as a security guard! I bet any good ol' man on the street could do that!

Awwww, goodbye pretty boy, you're screwed for screwing!

And goodbye Mr Joker, all great salutes to you(:

2008-07-30T01:37:00.000+08:00

once and for all, im just gonna say it all out...

I DREAD SCHOOL AND I DREAD FTB CAMP EVEN MORE!!!

there, u have it. i don't wanna go to smu despite all the good things everyone says about it. and yes, it's because i don't have any friends there!!!!! ))):

sigh, oh lord i'm really stepping out of my comfort zone i guess. good thing is school's only 20mins bus ride away and i can just come home everyday and hide in my shell. goodbye social life, hello mugger.

sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhh................. school......... smu................. sigh.................................... ):

2008-07-27T21:48:00.000+08:00

HEHE I'M BACK FROM MALACCA!!!!(((:

THE COMPANY WAS GREAT, THE SHOPPING.... NOT!!!!!

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT??? I CAME BACK STILL WITH $150 IN MY WALLET! AMAZING! HEH, BUT THANK YOU BABY FOR BREAKING YOUR RECORD OF THE NUMBER OF HOURS SHOPPING IN A DAY FOR ME!(((:

THE HOTEL WAS AWESOME. REALLY. FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE I FELL ASLEEP AFTER 5 MINS LYING ON THE BED! HAHA AND WE GOT THE SEA VIEW, AND THE BATHROOM WITH ULTRA COOL RAIN TREE STIMULATOR SHOWER! AND AND, COOL TOILET TOILETRIES FROM TEA TREE SPA WHICH FOR ONCE DIDN'T MAKE MY HAIR ALL TANGLY!

HAHAHA AND CXQ, I ATE CHICKEN RICE BALLS TWICE AND BOTH FAILED IN COMPARISON TO THE CHICKEN RICE STALL NEAR MY HOUSE. HAHAHA, SO MUCH FOR BEING POPULAR BECAUSE OF THEIR CHICKEN RICE!!!

SINGAPORE FOOD'S STILL THE BEST!

ALL IN ALL THE TRIP WENT WELL AND I'M REALLY THANKFUL FOR THE TRIP CAUSE IT REALLY BONDED US REAL GOOD BUT WILL I EVER GO BACK TO MALACCA? HMMM, I DON'T THINK SO.

PS/ IF ANY OF YOU WANT TO TAKE A COACH TO MALAYSIA, DON'T EVER TAKE KONSORTIOM'S!!! TAKE FIVE STAR FOR INSTANCE. I WAS SUPER ENVIOUS OF THEIR COACH!!!

2008-07-24T01:59:00.000+08:00

camp was alright... i made new friends, but wasn't for long cause i had food poisoning so it was basically cut short for me. i really wished i cld stay for the rest of the activities though! sighh!!! was kinda looking forward to the partyy.

hmm... so there's still a little uncertainty within me though, and in God can i only seek comfort.

welll, one more day till malacca!!! hope the trip goes well! (((:

okay off to bed now!
tatas!

2008-07-16T15:32:00.001+08:00

SIGHHH....

just when i thought all i have to worry about is for Monday to come...... a phone call came and stirred me up all inside over again.

So apparently, there's now a PRE-camp dinner on Saturday at Clark Quay! rahhhhh.... must i realllly go! i mean, whoever heard of a pre-camp dinner! i guess smu peeps are really kinda enthu.... which is a good thing i guess. at least there wouldn't be awkward introductory ice-breaking games when monday comes. that's just one of the worst things about camps besides, icy-cold showers which always, ALWAYS clogs in the cubicle(which is very very disturbing. imagine someone with her period and all and you're standing in this flood with possibly her discharge! PUKEEEE!), and don't remind me of those mindless amazing race...... and sleep! imagine sleeping with twenty-odd girls whom you only know for like, a few hours!

okay okay, i know i sound wayyyy too cynical.... sigh.

2008-07-14T23:48:00.000+08:00

FEED ME SOME KATONG LAKSA!! ROAR!!!

so bangkok trip has been changed to 2nights weekend cruise! heh, but it sounds good to me too!

social science campp soon... zzz!!!

2008-07-11T22:56:00.000+08:00

back from taiwannn!!!

it's currently my favourite country in the world besides SG(among all the rest that i've visited!) simply because you can just get lost among the endless sea of people and still be able to communicate with all the locals there! you almost feel like you can just blend in, like you belong somehow.

i miss that random aunty selling necklaces among tens and hundreds of pushcarts at the night market, i'm sorry i bargained 50bucks off Mr. Robot.

i miss that family who helped us with our heavy load when we were boarding the plane, God bless you for offering(:

i miss midnight snacks at Family Mart and chunky beef in our cup noodles(although i have twenty of them in my cupboard now!)

i miss taking cabs with ms octy, travelling to different night markets searching for the best deals.

i miss standing at the corner of the hotel lobby calling baby with the stupid, pathetic payphone, counting down to the mins i have left with the little amount of credit.

i miss hopping around buying snacks without having to feel guilty for indulging in too many oily, fried, unhealthy food.

i miss looking at clothes and bargaining down to the very dollar, as though 20 cents meant like the whole world to you.

back to life in SG, i woke up today with an urgent call to go help out at this chinese gift shop called The Chinese Gift Shop! hahahahaha so i'm officially working in an unofficial way till... hmmm, beats me!

i guess i could get used to this kinda life, watching each day drift past without planning for the future. you hardly can enjoy such anyway.

oh and matriculation sucks and check up at raffles@changi was quite an experience.

okay, gonna go drink my herbal chicken soup that mummy brewed! tatas, till then! (:

2008-06-26T02:06:00.001+08:00

thirty mins on my threadmill;

midnight tube time on Travel&Living;

two thirty-five am soccer matches;

late night driving to catch late night movies;

hopeless karaoke singing in the car;

2008-06-24T13:13:00.000+08:00

haven't been online lately mostly because of the lack of time and secondly, there really isn't very much reason to be here!

this weekend has been meeting-new-ppl overload. i think i added like, more than 20 new names into my people list! and i'm realllllly glad and thankful for the ppl that i met actually... haha it's somehow not as scary as i thought it'll be.

sat was my church tribe's overnight walk/camp at ECP and we walked allll the way from marine parade to the end of the beach's pathway which is like at tanah merah safra!! that was like, a whole 10km walk which we completed in five whole hours and i'm suffering from blisters now!

but i made some great realizations and friends throughout the walk with ppl in my group like Emma and Lay Cheng! Lay Cheng's a great great person to talk to despite the age gap. there's just soooo much to be learnt, and she somehow answered some of my questions regarding life and God. haha i guess that's why she's a teacher. she's just supppper insightful. and Emma's a great great girl, from gossiping (hahaha PS/ HE'S STILL NOT CUTE) to accompanying me and all!

and then i have to thank Andrew for carrying my bag for me half way through the walk...... HAHA IT'S NOT VERY LIGHT OKKK. AND MCKEN AND I DO EXERCISE!!! HAHAHAH

sooo... bbq later! haha actually i came online just to check on some chewy chocolate chip cookies recipe for the bbq later!

and and, i kinda lost interest in reading blogs already, so maybe i'll not be blogging as much.

it just saddens me that somehow realization has dawn upon me that life has to move on and ppl do that, with or without you. it's just so zzz. and i'm sure octy poky knows how i feel and what i mean... blah.

i know, i'm an escapist. always has been and perhaps always will be.

2008-06-09T23:14:00.000+08:00

PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!!!!!! ((((:

I PASSED, I PASSED, I PASSED!!!!

on a totally random note, i watched Narnia - the Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe over the weekend and i was just so enticed by it. it made me truly understand now the pain, the loneliness and the huge huge sacrifice that Jesus must have felt & made and I really don't deserve such a love as His. I've led such a tainted life and yet, someone as lovely, holy and pure like Him had to die just so that I could live again, just so that I can enjoy the wonderful gifts of His..... doesn't it just speak volumes of His love for me?

anyway, guess what! i met my primary sch friend at the driving centre today and... SHE'S GOING TO SMU SOCIAL SCIENCE!!! (((: yay! God truly answered my prayers(((:

heh.

and this little segment here goes out specially to my bestest friend, CXQ!

hello octy pocky, you're a year older yet again! (: you're just truly God blessed and i really thank you for being with me for these past few years, through the ups&downs in life. you've been the first person i run to whenever something happens in my life all these while and i know that nothing will ever change even though we'll be in different schools. remember, twenty-one! (((:

oh yes, one more thing!!! HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

2008-06-01T23:59:00.001+08:00

feeling a bit emo-ish... ):

smu = alone.

i need cxq by my side during orientations, in camps, during lunch, in classes, studying.................. sigh. i guess i'll miss the little stupid things that we do..... ))):

don't find a new best friend and please tell me everything still... promise?

stick my timetable in ur pencil box and find me whenever u can!

21, my lucky number as always and that's the number that will bring me to you! (((:

2008-06-01T21:31:00.000+08:00

there's practically nothing left to do online anymore! groannnssss.... i wanna watch the remaining eps of Greek & GG but my comp's toooooo sloww.... sigh!

baby just left for camp and i'm so so bored!!!

these few days have been amazing, heh. with all the watching vcds at home!

joey's birthday was love! we shld do it more often than limiting it to birthday dinners!

and i have a small confession to make! ..... i fell asleep today during sermon when Pastor Khong was half way through point #2 of the 3 fixed points in life... heeee =x

and i finally got to eat popeyes!

ahhh okay, i feel like jogging now! or maybe i shld go sleep? tired! driving at 1020am for the whole of next week cause my driving test's on the 9TH OF JUNE, WHICH IS LIKE, 8 DAYS TIMEEE??? pooot.

ok bye!

ps/ yum yum, thanks for always understanding and being around! LOVE YOU TO BITSSS!! ((:

2008-05-27T23:51:00.000+08:00

looking forward, i'm really quite afraid to venture into a whole new place alone.

i wonder why i didn't feel a sense of completion when i initially accepted nus, why i felt happier when i saw smu accepting me, why i was more drawn towards the envelope that read "Congratulations!" than the big brown envelope which I had been hoping to receive for the past few months because i more or less had forgotten about smu, why i had dreams about going to smu and why Pastor Eugene had to just so blatantly answer all my prayers and fears during his sermon on the one day that I decided to go to church after one month or so.

i know a part of me wants to go to smu for my own good, knowing that it'll offer me so much more in life, but then another part of me knows that i'm actually doing this for Him, for without His signs, i wouldn't have changed my mind, wouldn't even have bothered about the sense of uneasiness inside me after making my initial choice.

funny, but i'm really really afraid about the friends part. all these while, it hasn't been easy for me making friends and i'm really really blessed to have surprisingly made some very very good ones with the very pathetic 101-skills-of-making-friends that i'm equipped with.

and now, i have to go to two camps all alone?? God, please, please be with me!!! please be my friend at camp, ok?((: and can you be my partner too? haha or if u can't, then please send an angel down to Earth (more specifically SMU) and make her be admitted into social science too and be my classmate, ok? yay!

2008-05-25T23:08:00.001+08:00

God's really amazing sometimes, and He really spoke to me during sermon.
It was pretty much like a hit in the face so much so that even Mary(who was sitting in front) smsed me and told me so!

so before service i was having lunch with Mary and told her about uni stuff and all and she was just being a great listener.. among the great deal of stuff i said, i mentioned "comfort zone" and "fear" a couple of times. and the cool thing was, the topic for service was blatantly about stepping out of your comfort zone!

anyway, during the sermon, Pastor Eugene even gave the 3 steps for daring to live on the cutting edge - Step Out, Stand Out & Speak Out! so, to quote him, he said, "sometimes we ask God to transform us and draw us deeper to him but to live a life of faith, we have to step out of our comfort zone and allow God to show you His wonders," and it hit me because for these past few months, that was my exact prayer and the answers to it was echoing loudly through the loudspeakers. so aptly, just on the day when i decided to go to church and the day when i clicked on the 'submit' button.

and then Pastor Kwong also said, "God has taught me to dare to be different in fulfilling His promises."

and then i was thinking of my fears at that moment and all of a sudden, Pastor Eugene made a reference to Exodus 14:19,20

"Then the angel of God, who had been traveling in front of Israel's army, withdrew and went behind them. The pillar of cloud also moved from in front and stood behind them...Throughout the night the cloud brought darkness to the one side and light to the other side; so neither went near the other all night long."

and it assured me that God will be by my side, through it all(:

so i guess my decision has been finalized, and i thank God for the final push, the final word! (:

2008-05-24T22:41:00.000+08:00

somehow, despite the fact that to me, smu has more downsides to nus, smu seems much more appealing..... i just hope i wouldn't regret making my decision.

i just accepted smu's offer and suddenly everything seemed so finalized.
there are of course many opportunities gone with that click, which i admit that smu will not be able to offer me,mainly campus life & a sense of comfort, and the fact that nus is of a higher ranking...

but then again, an university education seems so different from a tertiary one, and i expect more from it. i see it as a ground where believes are challenged and a stepping stone to step out of my comfort zone. in other words, to gain a head start to grow up, and be independent before the real adult life begins and, it should be a given that nus' ranking's higher than smu's because of it's many more years of history(nearly a whole few good decades).

i'll continue to pray about it till 2nd june though, for He has the final word.

i just never saw myself as an smu student but i guess we shldn't be too quick to generalize students from different universities although it's inevitable? and maybe if it's true, then at least it'll be a fantastic opportunity to break out of the shell.

sighhh. but i'll miss blackiemoochikinorubberyoctycxq))):

2008-05-23T13:42:00.000+08:00

QUICK LIST OF PROS/CONS REGARDING CHOICE OF UNI (SMU VS NUS):-

SMU (PROS)

-near home
-jie's in there
-more hip, more vocal, more vibrant.
-possibly higher starting pay
-lots of presentations, experiences
-can opt for double major courses
-somehow, it's tougher to get in.
-like the professors who interviewed me.

SMU (CONS)

-don't like school's campus. don't think it's condusive enough for studying. very hostile feeling.
-mostly everyone's from RJC/HCI/VJC... all the top schools! will feel inferior and foreign.
-wont be able to blend in.
-near home, can't live on campus which i feel is quite important as it's part of uni experience and it's a once in a life time chance...2nd best to studying abroad.
- ppl too outgoing for my own good
- having gone to one focus grp is enough for me to see that i will never be able to enjoy their way of teaching
-had piano theory exam in one of their classroom and realized it's not very condusive. would prefer the old-school teaching style
-school's too young. nobody will know for sure how it'll be like 4 years down the road once i graduate.

NUS (PROS)

-can most prob live on campus! which is also very near baby's place!
-can still do double major if GPA is above 3.5(but if it isnt, then at least i know i'm not cut out for it and can just concentrate on my degree)
-FASS probably more reputable due to the history... at least it's a safe bet.
-most prob wants to do masters in speech therapy in NUS so it will be an easier transition as compared to getting SMU degree first.
-with all the hype over new NUS University Town, learning experience will most prob be more enriching as it'll be an integral part of campus life.
-a lot more students so can have better networking
- know at least 7 ppl studying there already!
-well established.

NUS(CONS)

-errr, nothing much?

2008-05-23T11:56:00.000+08:00

dearest yumyum,

there are probably too much words to be said to your reply to be tagged so i've decided to blog it so in time to come, you can still look back(:

i know how you feel, and trust me. i'm as afraid about the same things as you are (that's what same wavey is for right! hahaha) it's tough trying to go to uni, getting into uni and probably surviving uni. but hey, clementi&boonlay's only 4 mrt stops away right! we can still meet to study and stuff! haha instead of roaming whitesands, we can do IMM, Jurong Point,Jurong Entertaiment(although i irk at the thought of being an almost full-time westerner)! it's not as tough we're like 10000km away!

truth to be told, life will truly, really, be different without you. without those silly giggles that we share just between us, those times when we'll look at each other during other ppl's conversation and know just what we're each thinking about (which normally isn't a good thing! hahaha) and just motivating each other to study real hard as we work towards our common goal!

remember, uni = loner = study hard = GPA above 3.5!! hahaha

and darling, you don't have to feel guilty at all. to feel guilty is to 1)know that you've done a bad thing and 2)being subjected to a certain accusation. and you've commited neither of it for 1) there's no good/bad things between best friends & 2) i'll never ever accuse you of anything!

so don't fret lovely(:
everything's gonna be alright....and even if it's not, i'll be there when the skies turn grey(:

2008-05-23T01:01:00.000+08:00

everything now just seems to dawn on me - the poem i accidentally read, the disappointments, the worries, the kind words from ppl, baby's constant support(and i know it's been tough on you trying to curb all my tantrums), the many sleepless nights... the many prayers through the day&night.

it finally dawn upon me, and at a most apt time, that these times were for You to find me, rather than for me to find a path that You have painstakingly created many a years ago.

Thank You Father for everything that You have given me and for all the promises which You didn't forget. Yupp, it's true...God never forgets, and indeed, will never ever fail!!

(I JUST WENT TO LOG ON TO NUS STATUS ENQUIRY PAGE AND IT SHOWED I GOT ACCEPTED INTO FASS!!! I HAD NOTHING AND GOD BLESSED ME WITH EVERYTHING!) (((:

When you've prayed every prayer that you know how to pray.
Just remember the Lord will hear and the answer is on it's way.

Our God is able.
He is mighty.
He is faithful.

And He never sleeps, He never slumbers.
He never tires of hearing our prayer.
When we are weak He becomes stronger.
So rest in His love and cast all of your cares on Him.

Do you feel that the Lord has forgotten your need.
Just remember that God is always working in ways you cannot see.

Our God is able.
He is mighty.
He is faithful.

THANKS FOR ALL YOUR PRAYERS! CXQ, CHEN MAMA, JOEY FOR KEEPING YOUR 10 FINGERS&TOES & HAIR CROSSED, YUMMY&SHOK FOR THOSE SMSES OF ENCOURAGEMENT,BECKY&MINHUI FOR ALWAYS BELIEVING IN ME!!... AHHHHH! THERE'S TOO MUCH TO BE SAID WHEN YOU'RE ELATED!!!! SOOO, THANKS EVERYONE OUT THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PS/ I KNOW YOU'RE LOOKING OUT FOR A LITTLE NOTE FOR YOU, SO I'LL GIVE YOU THE BIGGEST EVER IN BIG, BOLD, RED!

THANK YOU BABY FOR ALWAYS BEING THERE FOR ME, LISTENING TO MY INCESSANT COMPLAINS AND WORRIES, AND ALWAYS PUTTING A SMILE ON MY FACE WHEN I'M SO SICK AND TIRED OF WAITING! (I KNOW SOMETIMES I REALLY PISS YOU OFF WITH MY SUDDEN TANTRUMS BUT THANKS FOR UNDERSTANDING! CAUSE AFTER ALL, I'M STILL YOUR BABY WHAT!!! I'M ENTITLED TO THROW TANTRUMS!!! WAHAHAHA!)

BUT OF COURSE, THANK YOU FOR REMINDING ME EVERY DAY & NIGHT THAT OUR DADDY IS ALWAYS WATCHING OUR BACK, ALWAYS PROMISING TO GIVE US THE BEST AND THAT HE INDEED NEVER FAILS.

YOU'RE GOD-SENT, YOU KNOW? (((:

2008-05-22T12:29:00.000+08:00

ALL I WANNA DO NOW IS TO GIVE THANKS!!! (((:

YUPP, GOD NEVER FAILS!!!
THANK YOU FATHER FOR STILL WATCHING OVER ME EVEN THROUGH THE MANY TRYING TIMES OF DOUBT! NO ONE DESERVES BETTER PRAISE THAN YOU!

THANKS FOR GIVING ME A CHANCE, I PROMISE I'LL STUDY REAL HARD!(:

NOW ALL I HAVE TO DO IS TO WAIT FOR NUS FASS!!!

HEH, AND I'M REALLY GLAD I MADE MAMA HAPPY WITH MY PHONE CALL!!

AND INDEED, GOD NEVER FAILS, AND ALWAYS PROMISES!

LOVE YOU ALL FOR STANDING BY MY SIDE TOO!

OH MY, MY FINGERS ARE ITCHING TO PLAY BABY'S PSP!! HEHE I COMPLETED DINER DASH IN 2 DAYS! AND I WANNA BUY A PINK PSP TOO SO I CAN FILL THEM UP WITH GAMES LIKE DINER DASH, CRAZY TAXI, RATATOUILLE, THE SIMPSONS GAME AND NOBODY SHALL COMPLAIN ABOUT THE GAMES BEING TOO GIRLY!!!

2008-05-15T23:52:00.001+08:00

he hung up the phone, the postman drove in, she skipped to her letter box and saw the red&white envelope sitting nicely on top of all the junks and all she has is nothing but praises for her Lord(((:

and now for it to hit the spot, just a big brown envelope will do!(:

thank u all lovelies for all the wonderful prayers!
and special thanks to chen mama, hope u'll find ur pretty red shoes soon! hahaha(:

one more night and baby's coming homeee!!!

army = stupid guard duty but wonderful encik showering privileges on the naughty OC Runner who ordered double cheeseburger delivery in camp!!!
hehe two extra days of leave just for him! now that's a realllly long weekend break!

okay i'm gonna end abruptly now. i love love city plaza trips with joey and qi & beef gimbap after that! i ate it 3 times this week already! heh, YUM JOIN US FOR CITY PLAZA TRIP SOON! HURRY TAKE LEAVE!!! HAHAHAHA!

2008-05-14T10:21:00.001+08:00

this whole month and april has been applying, waiting, checking mail box, waiting, checking online status, waiting, interviews, waiting, waiting and waiting.

it seems like the whole world has already moved on and i'm left alone here still waiting for something that might not even come.

i don't even know what i want now, what's in for me now, who's with me now...

i feel like just giving up on everything, pack my bags and go elsewhere to start anew.

sighhh... but i know that's not as easy as it sounds and i have got to trust real hard.

2008-05-06T20:25:00.000+08:00

89 words

Speed test

and just 1.5 hours!!! (((:

2008-05-04T00:40:00.000+08:00

sweet every day morning messages;
anticipation filled when checking mail box;
early morning nearly empty bus rides;
strawberry shortcake stickers;
lunch with mummy at Jack's;
trying on random dresses;
meeting up with jo;
seeing familiar faces amidst a sea of strangers;
circling parkway parade;
picking out assessment books;
helping jo with grocery shopping;
sounds of water splashing while being totally immersed in the kite runner;
and finally, finishing the other half of the book lying on my sofa, in front of the live telecast of man u vs west ham for the rest of the night.

(: and that was my nearly perfect saturday!

2008-05-03T00:04:00.000+08:00

l&m interview today along with a written test.
hmm, nothing much to talk about, nothing much to hope for.

i just hope i'd get my brown envelope soon!

ps/ the west is really, really crazy! sorry baby but.... i'll stick to the east!
haha and i'm glad you're real normal compared to the rest!

2008-05-01T22:28:00.000+08:00

and then I recalled what God so lovingly told me, "My Child, you must wait!"

(:

2008-05-01T00:01:00.000+08:00

i haven't checked my tags in a loooongg time so i'll reply them!

yum: we didn't get to eat cause the queue was crazily long!!! b&j had to borrow part of gloria jean's space!!! funny. hahahaha and btw, next sat sentosa with roxie and the boys, ok? ((:

bec: haha yeah! i'm glad i went!! hehe ((:

shok: yeah!! what happened to cycling!!! LET'S GO CYCLING NEXT WEEK!!!

jo: haha how did you manage to take those shots? did the auntie and uncle smiled or looked awkward??

baby: hahaha i know you didn't tag me. naughty you! but, 5 more days cause it's past midnight now!! ((:

and, another day has passed and still no letters coming in...
i really really dread the interview and writing test on friday... maybe i shld prepare for it.

sigh, it's scary to see the ppl around me getting accepted and i'm not!

trust God, yup! i'll ultimately do something that's the best for me(:

2008-04-30T15:02:00.000+08:00

ARGHHHH!!!!
CASEY AND EVAN NEARLY GOT TOGETHER AGAIN!!!!!!!

i really wanna see them together... they make such a sweet couple!!!

oh and ntu woke me up this morning... sigh, another interview!
and yum yum, IT'S ON FRIDAY TOO!!! (((:

ok gottah go!
hahahaha, bye.

2008-04-30T01:13:00.000+08:00

my postman hasn't visited me in quite a few days now...

please, please, please God. if i can't get into accounting then please don't make me yearn for it.

arghhh, all the straight A kids are stealing their well-deserving seats

bahh, all the letters, interviews, hi-tea stuff are making me so sick.

FASS, FASS, FASS...
i guess that's what i'll see eventually on my letter though... if i even get one.

on the brighter side, 6 more days!
and gossip girl's finally loading!!!

2008-04-29T02:26:00.000+08:00

i'm waiting for the arsenal match to start... probably in another 30 mins(see baby, i do love arsenal ok! heh)

dance was pretty good today, i just felt a little bit rusty! i can't wait for next monday's! (: it's actually quite therapeutic. and and and, MY TUMMY HURT WHEN I CAME HOME!!! gosh, it's even more strenuous than wushu's training... which in my opinion, was one of the worst already.

i HEART roxie's sleepover on friday. it's great to know that somethings will never change despite how little time we spend with each other now away from school and how there's no barrier between the four of us(:

haha yum, i really do hope our secret wish will come true!

sunday morn was my first lesson with xuan ru, a pri 2 kid, whom rose introduced. she was really cute and had this really lovely accent! i'm looking forward to the next time i teach her again! haha i feel like biting her cheeks.... is that ok?

anyway, baby's coming home soon! just another 7 more days... hahaha yes yes, i actually secretly countdown to the day he'll be home!

and.... free cone day's tmr! don't worry yum, i'll keep one for you!
IN MY TUMMY! hahahaha

ps/ i wanna have a really fun party/chalet/get-together!

2008-04-24T01:42:00.000+08:00

i just found out that MTV's really cool to play the full episodes of The Hills but... what's with those annoying unvarified adverts!!!

i'm so craving for chips now..
btw, i got to eat the yummy salmon and meatballs from ikea today with jo and qi! (:

AND YAY!!! TWELVE MORE DAYS!!! (((:

p.s/ baby, i wanna go to Paris with you! please brush up on your french!!!

2008-04-21T23:59:00.000+08:00

and happy one year and one month to you baby(:

i can't believe we've made it so far
as we flip the pages
everything seemed like a blur memory
as i hungrily crave for new ones

thanks for bringing out the best in me(:

just remember darling all the while
you belong to me(:

2008-04-21T23:49:00.000+08:00

i rejected nus nursing interview earlier and the person sounded as though it was a norm... oh well. i would have gone if they didn't put my interview at 9:15 AM... the fact that i've been waking up at 2pm nearly everyday made the interview timing a sign - that in no way am i gonna wake up at SEVEN in the morning and travel all the way down to go for an interview for a course which i've got ZERO interest in.

today was tea at coffee club with qi and jo.
i miss yummy, huffalump, horton! (ehh,cartoon character elephant names somehow starts with H!)

haha and thanks to Google, I managed to find a way to modify my cam to be fit for 35mm films!!!(:

and many thanks to the photo shop uncle who gave me a free B&W 120 film... although i highly doubt i'll use it cause it's expired.

and and, i walked home all the way from singlap(: i'm so proud of my two legs! hahaha although i took like, nearly 45 mins? butttt, the scenery was great!

oooh, angmokio hub exploring with shok tmr! i hope i find some goodies!!

jo, maybe one day we shld wake up really early and go down to a nearby wet market!(:

i love, love my holidays cause i get to explore the many different parts of singapore!!(((:

2008-04-21T01:07:00.000+08:00

i think dreams are God's way to tell you how the rest of your waking moments will be.

i had a horrible, tiring, nerve-wrenching dream last night that i felt so sucked by it and ended up waking at 2 in the afternoon today.

hence, i had a really bad, moody and boring day today.
everything seems to be going wrong and everyone seems to be saying the wrong stuff to my face.

today was basically spent fiddling with my cam, giving some therapy for my sunflower babies, lots of teevee and dinner with my grandparents(:

aahh, i think i should go to church more religiously (pun, hahaha)
it's funny, cause i've never really settled down in a cell before with all the cell groups and stuff.
i've a cell in church but they don't meet up and so we're not very close and i guess that's why i don't go to church when you're not around.

and i realised this's bad for me when you go to england!

i just feel so zzz.
oh well, at least we're half way through... just fifteen more days,baby!

and arsenal, oh arsenal... you break my heart so):

ON A HAPPIER NOTE, MY SISS BOUGHT ME MY CAMERA FOR MY LONG AWAITED BIRTHDAY PRESENT! HEH, IT'S PRETTY COOL AND I CAN'T WAIT TO START TAKING PHOTOS! JOEY JO, DATE ME OUT FOR SOME SHOOTS SOON!!! (((:

AND I CAN'T WAIT FOR OUR SLEEPOVER ON FRIDAY!!! HEHE! (:

p/s i just remembered those times during sec4 when shok and i would go around singapore to take photos of weird stuff like that indian man! hahaha

2008-04-18T20:21:00.000+08:00

today i awoke to smses from api api and joey! hehe, thanks the both of you for making me laugh straight after i woke up!

anyway, met joey and we decided to be Dora the Explorers!
We explored Arab St and Haji Lane and I bet we walked like, at least 3 kilometers? heh, though there weren't much stuff like what api api warned me, we managed to see many many pretty interior designing!

and i like the black chandelier!!!(:

then we went to Bras Brasah (hahaha api api, the name's not funny ok!) and saw many cool art shops and there's this really big popular there!

i wanted to buy this heart shaped clothes hanging thingy but it was too big for me to lug home, so, api api, you know what to do when you return!!! (((:

and then we walked all the way to suntec! bought this vest thingy from cotton on and i promise that it'll be the last thingy i buy before i go to taiwan (except for the GSS if the clothes are really cheap!)

and i realised i've been walking a lot these few days, home from parkway, from singpost, everywhere! (:

2008-04-17T20:49:00.000+08:00

time to reply tags!

yum: darling, it may seem like you are but you're always a part of our conversation and thoughts!!! (((:

becky: hahahah okay set, this monday!

shok: this monday dance!!! and you're right!! hahah i miss you!(:

clara jie: haha i want a tatoo! by KAT!

joey: thanks so much for all the talks this week! heh, you're really God sent! (:

i suddenly thought of the comic piece that Cavan wrote and drew which he so proudly showed me!

and it reminded me of you(:

2008-04-17T00:24:00.000+08:00

Wait

Desparately, helplessly, longingly, I cried:
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, "Child, you must wait."

"Wait? You say, wait!" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith, I have asked, and am claiming your Word.

My future and all to which I can relate
hangs in the balance, and YOU tell me to WAIT?
I'm needing a 'yes', go-ahead and sign,
or even a 'no' to which I can resign.

And Lord, You promised that if we believe
we need but to ask, and we shall recieve.
And Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply!

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master repied once again, "You must wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taught
and grumbling to God, "So, I'm waiting... for what?"

He seemed, then, to kneel, and His eyes wept with mine,
And he tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.

All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want--But, you wouldn't know Me.

You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint;
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint;
You'd not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there;

You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence were all you could see.

You'd never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit decends like a dove;
You'd know that I give and I save... (for a start),
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.

The glow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that's beyond getting just what you asked
Of the infinte God, who makes what you have LAST.

You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that "My grace is sufficient for Thee."
Yes, your dreams for your loved one overnight would come true,
But, Oh, the Loss! If I lost what I'm doing in you!

So, be silent, My Child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And though oft' My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer is still, "WAIT."

2008-04-16T23:56:00.000+08:00

just when i thought everything was going so well, nus had to send me a stupid stupid letter asking me to go for an interview... and somehow, it made my future all bleak again.

sigh, i've half the mind to reject that interview because i guess i'll never ever be interested in that course. but fears come along with it. the fact that i've been asked to go for an interview for that course, does it mean that i'm not eligible for my first few choices?

it's scary...

and today some tuition agent called me and gave me a really good tuition assignment but she didn't get back with me with the details, so, how?

i guess i should just start listening to advices, be humble, and stop thinking that i'm so right.

i hate opening hours.
why can't everything be opened 24hours like, hotlines.

don't they know to some people it's like a life and death issue?

i hate all these anticipation, but then i'm suddenly reminded by a poem i read at jo's church today... and amazingly, i felt God talking to me through it.

i guess all i can do now is wait(: